MARLOW BOTTOM

What many of you may have missed is that the story was covered in Saturday's Sun whose researchers had obviously been reading their Marlow Free Press.

BARN CLUB and Village Hall Trust both hold their AGM next week. Although they have been separate legal entities for some years, there is a lot of co-operation between them and it is rational that their AGMs should take place in the village hall from 8pm on May 25. If you want to influence either, please be there.

JAZZ at TJ's next week presents a double treat.

It's just a quartet jazz gig on Tuesday but with the amazing bonus that the star guest plays no less than seven different instruments. The very versatile Derek Nash, best known as leader of the popular Sax Appeal, will be demonstrating his famous talents on soprano, alto, tenor and baritone saxes, flute and clarinet and also the very rare and priceless plastic Grafton similar to the one often used by Charlie Parker and possessing a unique mellow sound.

Derek has won many British Jazz Awards both for his band as well as his solo performances and his all-action style has impressed the TJ's crowd on several previous occasions.

Music starts at 8.30pm with the resident Frank Toms Trio providing the backing, and admission is £6.

Two days after Derek Nash, on Thursday, the Berks Bucks & Oxon Big Band have their monthly charity concert. This one starts at 8.15pm with a £4 admission.

JOAN GILBERT has started the season of selling plants and other produce for charity. Traditionally, the first chunk of her annual takings goes to Send-a-Cow, the central African charity which sets up smallholders to be self-sufficient and to be able to provide animals and skills to neighbours so that they too can join the process.

Joan's garden is always open for you to inspect her sales stall. In spite of the cold spring, Joan is aiming to beat last year's record. She sent more than £1,000 to the various organisations she supported during the year.

GOVERNMENT concerns over mutual respect in the community last week touched on household discipline and even bedtimes.

It was bizarrely relevant to incidents which have been happening over the last few months in valley streets, the last one being last weekend. Residents of one road were disturbed by children playing raucously in the street. No particular damage was done, but children were roaming through gardens and tapping on windows with twigs.

The time was approaching 1am on Saturday morning. When challenged why seemingly 14 year olds were behaving like this, it was pointed out, politely as it happens, that they were only 12.

It was speculated by the residents that these may have been children participating in a sleepover party and that unsuspecting parents may have anticipated that their children were in control of hosts.

The neighbours they disturbed have stated that they will call the police on the next occurrence of this totally unacceptable behaviour.

THIS COLUMN has in the past been successful in uncovering potential volunteers for the Baden Powell organisations.

This is why Bev Botting is asking readers for help. New Guide leaders are desperately needed in the Valley. Sarah Owen, the Methodist Churches' youth worker, has been a leader in the 1st Marlow Bottom Guides for the last three years, but she is now moving to Sheffield to her new job and that leaves Bev Botting short of a leader.

She needs to recruit at least one person to replace Sarah (more than one would be helpful to allow rota duties and cover for necessary absences).

I hope to cover some of the Guides' activities in future columns just so that you should know what an important aspect of community life they represent.

I'm tempted to say one Guide's uniform is worth a thousand banned hoodies.

Bev would love to hear from you on 01628 478019 or you can email her on bev.botting@lineone.net THREE potential hazards for residents have re-appeared in the last week. Both are avoidable so long as people have their wits about them.

Firstly, we all enjoy something for nothing. A sudden upsurge of email news of winning in lotteries you've never heard of and messages from dying multi-millionaires who suddenly want to become philanthropists are easily dealt with; just DO NOT reply to them. An innocent reply simply tells them you're amenable to further treatment.

The second is the telephone call from, typically, an American voice overjoyed to tell you that you have won a trip to Bermuda, asking you to press nine to find out more. There is an electronic facility on modern phone systems that will allow the transfer of call costs to the recipient subscriber. In certain circumstances this can be achieved by the recipient pressing a programmed key sequence. Hang up immediately as the nearest you will get to Bermuda is, figuratively, its triangle.

The third is more local and affects more people. Sellers of household items at the door are often in the employ of taskmasters who transport them to an area to sell items at exorbitant profit. Police believe there could also be a correlation between such traders and subsequent outbreaks of burglary.

A group of doorstep sellers was persuaded to leave Marlow Bottom earlier this week. There is no evidence that these people were potential criminals but we should not take the risk to find out.

Do not buy from them, but inform the police immediately.

EYE CLAUDIUS could be the title of the tale of some remarkable surgery which has hopefully saved the sight of one seven months old cat called Claudius Sutherland.

An injury to the eye punctured the eyeball, a situation that tends to induce the iris to advance to seal up the wound as a defence mechanism. This adversely affects the sight, so the intruding part of the iris had to be excised in an intricate operation. Just think, in an object as small as a kitten's eye.

The operation has been followed by an intensive programme of visits for after-care.

So Marlow Bottom Vets Clinic has designated him their Patient of the Month.

CRITICISMS of the postal service are always set to gain supporters - usually for the critics, fairly or not. I thought you would like to ponder on our experience. We posted a small package on Wednesday of last week in Marlow Bottom post office, first class and well before the last collection at five.

But it didn't arrive the next day. In fact, it was Friday morning, almost two days after being posted, that it finally got to its addressee - in Basra!